The Opposite of Love isn't Hate... It's Indifference... What does indifference cost you and your organization?
The opposite of love isn't hate. It's indifference.
My good friend Don shared this thought with me during a Customer Service Experience learning program we were delivering to a major motorsports organization. The profound nature of this statement and the emotions tied to it blew me away.
It still blows me away.
How often do we pass by people without acknowledging them? Way too often... As Lance Secretan says in his great books (you need to read them!), we are all connected. We all want to be loved and feel important. Every time we pass by another human being - another soul - without acknowledging them - we miss an important opportunity to share our humanity and to lift others up.
In some cultures, walking by someone without acknowledging them is a way of communicating, "In my eyes you do not exist." Imagine what that must feel like. And I take it for granted in the name of being busy... It's a cold way of being...
Why do I do this? I really believe it is an unconscious act. But part of it is conscious - more on this later... Sometimes I get so busy in life working on the tasks that I am checking off my list that I forget the important things. Perhaps you find yourself in the same place - busy with little time to do what matters - like pay attention to those around us.
One day, I will die. And the question burning in my mind right now - and I know I will ask myself it - did my impact on this world really matter? Did I make the biggest possible difference I could have? Treating others indifferently leads to only one thing - more indifference - and ultimately it leads to me diminishing what is possible in the lives of others.
How do people act when they are treated with indifference? Indifferently. We are emotional creatures. What is done to us, we do to others. The opportunity is to create a different story - a story of hope, optimism, love, and difference-making. I recently listened to Daniel Goleman's Social Intelligence audio program. In it he talked about how emotionally contagious we are to one another with regard to how we feel and how others pick that up. How often do I help others feel unimportant because I treat them indifferently? I must stop this emotional virus-passing!
Is this what I want my legacy to be? Absolutely not. This is the conscious part... And opportunity... I can consciously choose to acknowledge others and give them the attention the deserve and hope for. I think a lot of the world is hurting from lack of love and attention.
Recently, I received some attention while shopping at Target a woman walked by me and looked me right in the eye and smiled. It warmed my heart. I remember thinking, "Wow!" I found myself a bit refreshed. I found more energy in that moment and afterwards. I immediately thought about paying it forward to others - to give them the love they needed.
Sounds corny, doesn't it? But you know what? As a 35 year old man on his journey, I will remember the feeling I received as I treated others with kindness by not ignoring them when I could have. That's energy... That's the power of connecting.
One of our clients has a powerful Difference-Maker on their bus. Her name is Maureen. When I call, I always hope she answers the phone because the warmth is amazing. At our zoo, they have some tortoise turtles who love to bask under heat lamps. That's how I feel when I talk with Maureen... Warm. And when I see her - she greets me with a warm smile and a warm two-handed handshake. Maureen lives the opposite of indifference. She's a Daymaker of the best kind! And Maureen is a very powerful spirit because of the way she helps people feel... Question... What would you do to have more "Maureens" as part of your Customer Experience Management Strategy?
Take a few moments to think about your Customer Experience. Not just your organization's or your department's, but yours personally. What does your Customer Experience feel like? Are people treated indifferently on a routine basis by you and your team members? Perhaps you might start out by acknowledging your team members and in turn help them feel the impact of acknowledging others. Every Customer Service Training Program should include helping team members realize the true power of making a positive impact in the lives of others. No exceptions. Unfortunately, most Customer Service Training Programs focus on the "what" to do and not the "how" to do it. The "how" is what matters most, after all...
Hey... Can we partner to make indifference an endangered species. One small act - repeated several times a day - by greeting and acknowledging those we meet will touch their hearts and who knows - it might even save a life. Acknowledgement is the ultimate form of Daymaking that I can think of. And interestingly - I am not sure whose day is made better - mine or the other person's.
Now go Maximize Possibility!
Other blog posts you may be interested in:
- Customer Service Defined by Four Little Words
- Consistency is Key to an Exceptional Customer Experience
- Bad Customer Service - What is it Costing You?
- Are Your Vendors Hurting the Customer's Experience
Chris Young helps organizations Maximize Possibility through talent management, cultural transformation, and strategic intervention. Bring Chris in today!
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